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Humor Yang Satu Pencipta Lagunya

Di sebuah toko penjual burung, mempunyai 2 burung kakak tua. Kedua burung itu
berbeda, yang satu suka bernyayi dan yang satunya lagi hanya diam saja, datang
seseorang ingin membeli burung kakak tua. Ia berkata kepada si penjual burung :

Pembeli : "Berapa harga burung kaka tua ini mas...?"
Penjual: "Kalau yang suka nyayi itu 500.000 rupiah, sedangkan yang diam itu
1.000.000 rupiah."

Pembeli: "Lho kok yang suka nyayi harganya lebih murah dari yang hanya diam
saja."

Penjual: "Yah.... jelas beda wongyang harganya 1.000.000 itu pencipta lagunya
kok."

DI Keluarkan Baru Di Garuk

Sang pasien mati-matian membujuk dokter agar tidak membedahnya.
"Sebetulnya saya tidak menderita penyakit yang serius," ungkapnya,
"kecuali usus buntu saya agak terasa gatal."
"Baiklah kalau begitu," jawab dokter,"mari segera kita keluarkan."
"Apakah usus buntu ini harus dikeluarkan hanya karena gatal sedikit, Dok?"
"Tentu saja," balas dokter dengan nada tidak sabar.
"Setelah dikeluarkan barulah kita bisa menggaruknya."

Bapak Saya Bohongi

Seorang pemabuk berat dengan cueknya kencing di tengah-tengah lapangan.Seorang
petugas menghampiri dan menegurnya :
Petugas : Hei...Sembarangan kamu yaaa...ngga tau banyak orang apa... cepat
masukin kecelana kamu punya barang !!!
Pemabuk : Baik baik pak...
Pemabuk tsb memasukkan anunya ke dalam celana & mengancingkannya, tetapi
tidak lama kemudian dia tertawa keras dan terpingkal pingkal.
Petugas : Hheeeii...kenapa kamu ketawa..menertawakan saya ya...?
Pemabuk : Ennnngggaaaaaa kok...bapak saya bohongin lhooo... barang
sih sudah saya masukin tapi saya tetap kencing kok pak...

Sedang Menyamar

Suatu pagi, seorang juragan sedang membawa jalan anjingnya yang kurus dan
jelek. Di tengah jalan, pak budi tetangga sang juragan bertanya,
"juragan, anjingnya jenis apa sih ?"
kemudian sang juragan menjawab, "oh, ini anjing pelacak."
Pak budi bertanya lagi, "ah, masa anjing pelacak kurus dan jelek begitu ?"
"Sssst...jangan keras-keras ngomongnya, dia sedang menyamar !"
kata sang juragan.

Wanita Bersaudara Kembar

Dua orang pemuda sedang berbincang mengenai peruntungan mereka dalam mencari
teman wanita. Pemuda yang satu berkata bahwa kini ia berpacaran dengan seorang
wanita yang mempunyai saudara kembar.
"Kembar?" tanya temannya terkagum-kagum.
"Lalu bagaimana kau membedakan keduanya?"
"Gampang saja. Abangnya mempunyai kumis."

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