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Humor Blackberry Dan Laptop Baru

Bendol Jokey

ceritanya waktu dulu pas mbah bendol kelas 6 SD

bendol : weh jo.. bolos yuk
jokey : enggak ah takut ketauan pak guru
bendol : udah gapapa kita kan udah UN jadinya bebas
jokey : ywdh deh

tiba-tiba pak guru melihat

guru : mau kemana kalian
bendol : bolos pak
guru : kalo kmu tetep bolos.. kmu akan tidak naik kelas
bendol : biarin pak
guru : bapak ni serius bukan main2
bendol : yah saya juga pak
guru : kmu gak naik kelas
bendol : biarin, gak naik kelas..kan bentar lagi mau lulus bukan naik kelas,jadi saya gapapa kok gak naik kelas
guru : @?&%$
jokey&bendol : *kabur*

Blackberry Dan Laptop Baru

Udin : wah BB lu baru MAN?
MAN : iya dong!
Udin : wah laptop lu baru bee?
obee : harus dong!
Udin : kalian beli dimana?
MAN & obee : gak beli, cuma dapat hadiah *serempak*
Udin : emangnya lomba apaan?
MAN & obee : lomba lari *serempak lagi*
Udin : berapa peserta?
MAN : RATUSAN!
Udin : masa cuma ratusan?
obee : iya ratusan, hebatkan kita berdua?
Udin : he'em...bangga gue punya teman kayak lu berdua!
MAN : padahal pesertanya itu ada POLISI, WARGA sama yg punya BB dan laptop ini!!
Udin : ?????

Dewa Kwankong

Suami Istri yg miskin berdoa kepada dewa kwankong (dewa yang menaiki seekor kuda)

Suami, Istri : "Dewa, tolong berikan hamba rumah yang layak untuk kami tinggal"

Kemudian dewa itu memberikan rumah..

Suami istri berkata lagi kepada dewa kwankong dan berkata, "Dewa, kami sekarang sudah berkecukupan.. Tapi kami tidak mempunyai keturunan.. beri kami anak, dewa.."

Kemudian dewa itu memberikan mereka seorang anak laki-laki..

Seiring jalannya waktu anak itu sudah berumur 17 tahun.. Dan saat ulang tahun nya mereka menghadiahkan sebuah motor ninja RR 250 cc untuk anak itu..

Kemudian mereka berdoa dan meminta lagi pada dewa.. "Dewa, trima kasih untuk smuanya .. Tapi satu permintaan kami.. Tolong jaga anak kami ini ,dewa.."

Dewa itu menjawab "iya, akan ku jaga anakmu.."

3 hari kemudian .. Anak itu meninggal karena kecelakaan ngebut-ngebutan..

Lalu suami istri itu marah dan berkata: "Dewa, kenapa kamu ambil anakku, katanya kamu akan menjaga anak kami ,kenapa kau tidak menjaganya?!!" Sambil berurai air mata..

Dewa itupun menjawab
"Eh semprul, lu liat dong anak lu naek motor ninja RR nopego cc lagi, lah lu liat gw naek kuda, gimane gw bisa ngejar !!"

Minum Kopi

Pasien : "Dok… setiap saya minum kopi dari cangkir, rasanya mata kanan saya seperti ada yang menusuk-nusuk dok."
Dokter : "OOO.. itu masalahnya. Kalo begitu, setiap mau minum kopi keluarkan dulu sendoknya dari dalam cangkir."
Pasien : "O… Terima kasih, Dok.."

Cerita Lucu Cak Lontong (ILK)

Bicara soal takut, saya sama sekali bukan orang yang penakut. Sejak lahir, saya bukan orang penakut. Bahkan waktu saya lahir, banyak orang yang takut sama saya. Ada cerita sedikit yang menunjukkan saya bukan orang yang penakut Di kampung saya ada sekitar 100 kepala keluarga. Jam 1, kampung saya diserbu geng motor. Kaca-kaca rumah dipecahkan. Yang namanya Ketua RW lari. Ketua RT lari. Kepala Keluarga lari. Saya yang wakil ketua nggak lari… karena saya wakil ketua geng motor itu.

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